Pictures of my lovely lung lump
As I commented previously, my lovely lung lump was to be assessed by a third opinion of the radiologist. This third opinion was decidedly indecisive as well, so I have made the call to get what they call a biopsy. For the uninitiated (to whom I belonged not so long ago), a biopsy is when they stick a needle in you and get a sample, like the counter girl at Baskin Robbins reaching into the chill box for a sample of ice cream. Only without all the flavors.
As promised, I now have pictures. I initially thought the lump was on my left side, so I will now need to shift my false psychosomatic pains to my right side. I am unsure the height, but it is a healthy 15 mm wide.
In preparation for the procedure next Wednesday, I had to acknowledge some risks associated with the operation.
- >5%: localized bleeding, coughing up blood, or my lung collapses like a balloon, to which apparently they blow it back up with a tube.
- 1 to 5%: Infection, or an air embolism causing a heart attack or stroke. I am assuming they know CPR, so if it has to happen anywhere, I would rather it be on the table.
- <1%: Death from “complications”.
I am grateful for managing my expectations, as I would be annoyed afterwards if I died and they had not told me beforehand. In general, I play the odds, and am confident in the checks and balances from our litigious society. The hospital is filled with competent, capable, educated professionals with insurance to the gills, which means either everything will go as planned or my family is set for life. Either way, I have no worries.
I am interested in comments on what the lump actually is. My thoughts include:
- a growing watermelon seed I snorted last summer
- the alien love child from when I was abducted when I was 13
- the “true world”, for which all of history has been preparing us
- a portal to another dimension that will release the giraffes of hell through my chest cavity when prodded with the needle
If it is the last option, you have my sincere apologies, and I wish you the best as you make plans for your weekend.
I’m interersted in some of your thoughts specifically the ones pertaining to your x-ray images.
It would seem your feet have eyes which makes the lump the least of your problems. Also, how can you tell the other image is taken from your front and not your back?
In all seriousness tho we’re (my life partner and I and the new addition) are genuinely thinking of you and hoping for the watermelon seed option.
I know it is from tthe front because my “L” shoulder tattoo showed up on the x-ray.
I appreciate the thoughts, although I suspect that the new addition is thinking about pooping more than me. 🙂
Yes, if your lung collapses, they will blow it back up. Jeff has had that done a few times. Just make sure they don’t blow it up too much or your right side will be larger than your left! 🙂
As for what it actually is …
If it was that watermelon seed from last summer, I believe it would be larger than it is now and have some shoots/leaves off it.
It couldn’t be an alien love child … they swore to me they only wanted to talk with you …
Love and prayers,
Your sis,
Crys
Why did Jeff have it done?
Maybe lung inflation would replace my steroid therapy for bulking up.